|
Date: November 24, 2003
One day I was hitchiking a ride with an Australian and a New Zealander when
we see a sheep with its head stuck in a fence.
South Australia is sheep country. Just north of Coober Pedy, I passed through
one of the gates of a 6500 kilometer long dog and rabbit fence. This is meant
to keep the dingos from eating the sheep and the rabbits from eating the plants
in the fertile south but, as a local told me, "It just separates one dingo
from another."
The Aussie jumps out of the truck. "I won't be a sec', boys." He
swaggers over to the sheep, pulls his pants down and gives the sheep a good rooting.
He swaggers back to the truck and says to the Kiwi, "Your turn, mate."
The Kiwi hops out of the truck, runs over and sticks his head in the fence.
That was all true except that the Aussie guy just told me the joke (and a dozen
more) which sets the tone for the following:
I've been traveling with Matt Bell, an Aussied bloke from Melbourne that I
met in Kathmandu. Matt's bicycled all the way overland from Scotland to Melbourne
excepting the ocean. So, when Matt sees the first sign that reads "Melbourne"
he says, "It really does exist," and gives it a big lippy kiss. I am
the photographer for this moment and make him hold the pose for a few seconds
longer than necessary so I can watch the _expression on passing motorists.
After I say, "Well...?"
"Well what?"
"Is it my turn?" I ask innocently.
He laughs, "Well, yeah, mate, pucker up."
It's been a pleasure touring Oz with Matt. He's embodies the Australian virtues
of being open-minded, good-humored and tough as nails. He's very proud of his
country and hospitable; he's given me a good tour, for instance, he spent days
looking for a koala bear and eventually spotted one of the slothful buggers napping
in a tree. The koala bear woke, starred at me for a few seconds then went back
to sleep. It was very exciting.
After a few weeks in South Australia, I have inadvertently trained Matt to
salivate like one of Pavlov's dogs. I have a habit of ringing my bell everytime
a beautiful woman passes. I love to see them smile. Sometimes I ring my bell just
to watch Matt whip his head from side to side scanning the streets for pretty
women. Matt's off to Tasmania now and I'm heading to Sydney for New Year's Eve.
I'll miss ringing Matt Bell's bell.
|
